There are many elements that add up to creating a healthy relationship. For example, you need to feel mutual respect and trust. Also, honest communication is a must. Drug addiction has the potential to alter all three of those factors. For the addict, the overriding desire to get high takes precedence over everything else.
As a result, someone in the throes of drug addiction may not be trustworthy. They may treat their partner disrespectfully, and trust feels like a distant memory. In the name of inspiring you to get the help you need, let’s further break down the basic ways drug addiction can affect your relationship.
4 Ways Drug Addiction Can Affect Your Relationship
Sex
When your partner is addicted, their top priority is getting high. But even when the desire is there, the body may not be willing. Of course, in a situation where you feel disrespected and betrayed, you may also lose interest. It is not unusual for drug use to lower one’s libido and cause erect dysfunction.
On the other end of the spectrum, the person who is taking drugs may be very interested in sex—just not with their partner. In an altered state of mind—particularly when surrounded by other users—cheating is common. This, in turn, will serve to destroy trust further.
Finances
Drugs cost money. A user’s willingness to spend whatever it takes to get their hands on the drug of choice will heavily impact their partner’s life.
Emotions
Add up all you’ve read so far in this post, and you can easily imagine how drug addiction will put you on an emotional roller coaster. You may try to accept that substance abuse is a mental health disorder, but it is easier said than done. As time passes, you might only see your partner’s lies, criminal acts, betrayals, and threats.
Safety
Drug use tends to cause dramatic mood swings and irrational behavior. This reality can put one or both partners at high risk for violence and abuse.
Another Big Issue is Codependency
Despite the major issues discussed above, there is a parallel track upon which drug addiction derails relationships. It starts when the non-using partner decides to do whatever it takes to “fix” the addicted partner. More often than not, this creates a climate of codependency.
In a situation of codependency, the addict will be angled by their partner’s desire to cover up and/or finance their use. This not only prevents the substance-abusing partner from getting the professional help they need, but it can also negatively impact the enabling partner in many ways. Why would someone choose such a path when confronted with an addicted partner? It could be that the enabling partner is struggling with their own issues, e.g.:
A hard time saying “no” and a fear of rejection or abandonment
Feelings of guilt and self-blame for their partner’s addiction
Low self-esteem and an unwillingness to assert themselves
Desperately needing the approval of others
An unhealthy desire to be needed by someone unable to help themselves
Such a dynamic enables the worst impulses in both partners while allowing the emotional, sexual, financial, and physical costs to continue unabated.
How to Stop These Destructive Cycles
Such changes will not happen quickly, but they can be helped with the help of a mental health professional. Whether you attend individual or couples counseling (or both), the goals will include accepting that you are stuck in a dangerous cycle. From this starting point, you can begin making new decisions designed to help both your partner and yourself.
If you or your partner are struggling with drug addiction, it is vital that you reach out for professional support as soon as possible.
